Ugh

the weekend of June 11th was one of the worst of my life.

first, Sweetheart realized that he broke his wedding band. how he broke it, we dont know, but it was cracked and pieces were missing.

next, Sweethearts attorney called to tell us that his trial was being postponed... again. we were supposed to get this done last November, but it has been pushed back and pushed back. that was really devastating for me. I want to move on with life. until his name is cleared, he cant get his license with the State Board of Nursing and until he gets his license, he cant work. he has been out of work since October. yeah, he picked up a few one day jobs here and there, but he needs a real job. the stress of being the sole incomer earner has taken a huge toll on me. Im struggling at work and having trouble sleeping and getting migraines. Im falling apart. I try to keep it together, but I feel like Im drowning every day. I try not to cry when Sweetheart is around, because I know that not working makes him feel like a failure.

last, our puppy got sick and died. she was sick one night, and the next morning when we woke up, she was dead. Sweetheart went out to check on her, and I knew instantly. it was the last straw for him. Zoe was his first pet, you know. you can only take so much bad news in a 24 hour period. Zoe was our baby. the three of us were a little family. I had some friends who called her Zoe the Cutest Puppy Ever. and she was. she had such a cute little personality. we called her Zo-Zo and Zoetrope and Trope and Tropee. I miss her. if she came into the room when I was taking a bath, she would take a flying leap and jump in with me. I dunno why she would do that, since she hated water and never enjoyed her own baths, but it was always really cute and we would laugh at her.

sometimes, I just feel like "life sucks and then you die."